Rain

Here I stand, hands in pocket, waiting for the Moon to show. Expecting as it came yesterday, bright and cheerful, shimmering amongst a sea of black. Moon would call, and I would come. Once, Moon and I went to a place we've never been, of plains and trees and tranquil. Then I knew we were never to part. I belong to her.

Then a Star came, shining brighter than most of the other stars. Star took the Moon away. They belong to each other.

I no longer see the Moon but I know it's there and it will never go away. Sometimes I find myself waiting in the dark, yet I know Moon will never come. But Moon will never be gone.

My Reason is You

Watching the new Bridget Jones Diary movie, I spent almost every moment in frustration, torment, bitter agony. It's not that it's bad, I've just lost all possibilities to appreciate any love story. Some may react: Oh, this man is so horrible to say such things! You'll get to know the feeling when your soulmate and the one you're destined to be with is marrying someone else. You get that premonition you'll be miserably lonely for the rest of your life. My lovelife is a f*cked up fairy tale.

If you're feeling down after reading that, you're taking it the wrong way. You should be thankful someone else is farther down the sh*thole.

I always get on a spending binge after a heartbreak; more pain, more buying. Better start saving up, this one's going to knock the bells off a few cash registers.

Quote of the Day

I was not delivered unto this world in defeat, nor does failure course in my veins. I am not a sheep waiting to be prodded by my shepherd. I am a lion and I refuse to talk, to walk, to sleep with the sheep. I will hear not those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious. Let them join the sheep. The slaughterhouse of failure is not my destiny.
I will persist until I succeed.
Henceforth, I will consider each day’s effort as but one blow of my blade against a mighty oak. The first blow may cause not a tremor in the wood, nor the second, nor the third. Each blow, of itself, may be trifling, and seem of no consequence. Yet from childish swipes the oak will eventually tumble. So it will be with my efforts of today.
I will be liken to the rain drop which washes away the mountain; the ant who devours a tiger; the star which brightens the earth; the slave who builds a pyramid. I will build my castle one brick at a time for I know that small attempts, repeated, will complete any undertaking.
I will persist until I succeed.

Full text here

Guns and Singing Architects

Last night we went to the gun show at Megamall. There were pistols and longarms of all sorts. The .50cal magnum revolvers were HUGE and bloody lethal even when unloaded. I got to handle a real AK-47. There's a 9mm pistol called 'Buddy', you can get for only P9,990. Dissappointingly I learned the HK Mk.23 costs above P120K, and near impossible to get registered as it's meant to be silenced. Dangit.

Off to Virgin Cafe T.Morato for a cousin's band anniversary. He was part of a second generation (playing 80-90s era music, their first batch was playing 70s to way-back era) of Arkiband, a band of architects. Oh yes, they're all architects. You can tell by the sponsors (Boysen and a whole bunch of construction material brands). Free entrance, free food, good music, what could go wrong? They even raffled off some appliances, too bad we missed it. Happy Anniversary Arkiband!

Name my baby contest

The hardest part of applying for a trade name has got to be naming it. So far, every acceptable one I've thought of has been taken: FastTrack, Big Cheese, G&P, even PPB.

Prizes will go to whoever thinks up the coolest name for a company. It doesn't have to be related to anything. Post your entries now!

Better donuts than Go-Nuts (IMHO)

If you're craving for another batch of crispy cream donuts, U-turn on over to Katipunan and down to a donut place called Cello's dips & doughnuts (make sure to enter the service road). They have the lightest, softest donuts with unusual but delightful flavors like cheese (mmm I liked it), M&M, or Oreo. You can get the sugar-glazed and dip it in dark chocolate, white chocolate-strawberry, or Toblerone (mmmmm I like it like it, but they were out).

All this online reading and e-books is giving me a headache. I think it'll be a justified investment to acquire a 17" LCD monitor (Samsung with black frame, P27K). Then I'll be needing to replace the video card (around P15K) since this one hasn't a DVI port. But then the motherboard will have to be upgraded with one that has PCI-X ports (P6K) to accept the newer video card models. The new motherboard will need more power from a new PSU (P3K), which will only fit the larger cases (P10K). The new mobo also uses SATA, ergo new HDDs (120Gb 8mb cache, P6K). I'll also need a new mouse and keyboard (Logitech of course, P4K), to match the black color of everything else.
Conclusion: I'll be needing a total of P71K to upgrade the radioactive (it emits harmful radiation, according to experts) CRT monitor to LCD. It beats laser eye-surgery (P150K) and migraine medication (P5K) by a mile! More than 50% savings!

A loaf of bread, a cup of milk, and a stick of RAM

Warning: the following is not recommended for non-computer enthusiasts (geeks) or the faint-hearted

My stock CPU fan's RPM dropped to half, and was necessarily replaced by a snazzy Coolermaster XDream II (8cm silent metal-finned fan, aluminum heatsink with copper insert). The CPU temp stays around 42 C idle, a big improvement from 52 C idle while using the stock fan that came with the processor.

The computer acted up shortly after, beeping and beeping and beeping and not booting up. The motherboard's debug display showed C1h, which meant memory problems. I tried installing the RAM (I only have one 512Mb stick) in each of the memory slots and altering the voltage, but alas, all efforts failed. Replacing it would cost me a little less than five thousand. We didn't want it to end this way, it was all too sudden. Losing hope I started scraping off the label and warranty stickers, cleaned it up real nice. I dressed it up in copper heat spreaders, if it's gonna go, at least it's gonna go looking cool. I tried putting it in for one last time, like the final ritual of checking for breath and pulse. But wait! Everything started working as it should be! It beeped once, went to Windows loading screen , to the logon screen, then to the desktop! Oh happy happy joy joy!

And in geek tradition I'd like to pay tribute to my specs: AthlonXP 2400+ with Coolermaster XDreamII, Epox 8KHA+, Kingston 512Mb DDR333, Gainward Geforce3 Ti500 64Mb, Seagate 20Gb 7200rpm HDD, Samsung CD-RW 52/24/52x 8Mb, Samsung 52x CD-ROM, Soundblaster Live 5.1, Logitech Z640 5.1 speakers, Exodus 350W dual-fan, 17" monitor

It started as this: Athlon 1.1 with Globalwin TAK68, Epox 8KHA+, 128Mb DDR266, 3dfx Voodoo3 16Mb, Maxtor 10Gb 5400rpm HDD, LG 52x CD-ROM, Soundblaster Vibra128, Labtec 2.1 speakers, Exodus 300W, 14" monitor

Market! Market!

Up-market, down-market, bull market, bear market, blah blah. Never heard it before as many times as I've been hearing and reading it lately.

Just signed up for an account on CBS.MarketWatch. Can I really go through with this? I have no idea what the blokes are saying. There are familiar words here and there; I get to say "Uy, alam ko 'to ah!" whenever I come across the words 'the Internet', or 'Microsoft'. It's like having a vivid dream, you wake up and remember the details but forget everything by the time you get out of bed. Or taking Accounting for two semesters, then one year after graduation the only thing you remember is that a P5,000-below annual income isn't taxed, and you're not even sure.

Oh yeah, a cousin got a K700i. It's as gorgeous as I imagined, but the first unit he got was faulty. If your unit has bugs or operates slowly, exchange it in for another one immediately. I think I'll get one when I need it, or just when it's being phased out and costs P10K (from the current price of a whopping P23K)

The Olivarez Mystery

Yesterday was a perfectly nice day to go on a road trip, so my friends and I did. To summarize, we made our way to Tagaytay in a roomy yet incomparably sluggish Liteace, seeing twenty-something Colette's stalls along the road, getting a few snapshots and burning a few hundred thousand calories through Picnic Grove's eco-trail, a tasty and unusually clean isaw (the search for Olivarez, source of coffee beans, starts shortly after), a lovely lunch at a place we've never been before, then shopping at some factory depots on the way home.
It was a nice day spending it with some of my closest friends, even a clump of some large animal's droppings getting stuck under a shoe and into the van wouldn't have ruined it. To those that should've come but couldn't, I hope we'll all be there on the next trip!

$10,000!

I won $10,000! Thats about P563,000! I'm a half-millionaire at the age of 22!

I'm gonna buy a SE K700i and a Canon A85, then put the rest in time-deposit, then after five years I'd have used it to buy seven or eight properties.

The letter was from Worchester Jewelers London through a Canadian escrow Chase Wilton & Weede. They just asked me to sign the affidavit and send it back within ten days. A quick google showed no results from both companies, except that some guys received as much as six winning letters.

Bah, to hell with that.

For those that strive to become

A quote from Former US President Theodore Roosevelt, from The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by J. Maxwell:

"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiams, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

How to sell kebab

Came across a new Persian diner this afternoon. It had no door, the entire wall just opened up with Persian arches. There's even a space of low tables and cushions for seating so you can eat Persian-style. But I didn't buy a shawarma because of the unique presentation and ambiance.

I bought two because the girl who owns it was pretty and smiles a lot.

It was good though. The galic sauce was thick and savory, and the chili sauce was red-hot spicy.

Pity: out of stock

Someone I just met told me that she was sick, never seriously specifying of what. Then she messaged me that their family doctor told her to 'amuse herself to avoid thinking about it', and that her parents cry whenever she asks them about it. People usually get depressed when someone so young has that kind of a problem. But oh no, not me. The weirdo strikes again.

I felt no pity, no hopelessness; just torn as to what to say. We confront these cases regularly, and the specialists have treated them successfully. But the doctor brooding inside (you get that by hanging inside hospitals) tells me not to get her hopes up too much.

But this is what we do, we give hope and we change lives. We'll never know what we are truly fully capable of until we try to do what was never done, or was never thought possible.

happy bertday toyo

belated happy birthday ka-berks Roselle! may you continue to receive His blessings, as you do deserve them all. Gracias por el banquete maravilloso! let's do it again hehe, it's nice that we get to hang around sometimes.
drop by gloi's blog to see our group pic :)

fairy tale

The glances, averted eyes, awkward smiles. Our fingers touching
unintentionally. Words I meant but hid behind the mask of
ridicule. Words you said that would've meant the world if only
they had the slightest truth.

You are my everything.

And you will never know.

O.T. Part XIV: Ang lalaking ihi lang ang pahinga

Working in Makati doesn't mean I'm big-time, it just means I have no-time for anything else.

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The road less travelled is a difficult and lonely path. Whoever strays away from what is accepted as normal should be prepared to be laughed at, shunned away, scorned upon. But those that laugh are insignificant, they haven't the strength nor courage to find their own way. What they do is normal and accepted, and most probably being done by everyone else already. Normal is synonymous to average is synonymous to commonplace.
Then there are those that lead, inspire, and find their own way in this sea of uncertainties. Travelling alone, lonely, battered, exhausted. Then to find an uninhabited island, to claim it as his own, to make it a paradise of his own design.
These are the people that we now come in droves to, dressed up all clean and spiffy, and clamor to be part of their company. All the while thinking it might also happen to us, but won't.

With great power...

...gets the girl!

Now I know why Spiderman 2 is such a hit! Everything about it so cool cool cool cool! The CGI effects were impeccable, the action sequences were gut-wrenching, and the comedy was smart and witty. The fight scenes were definitely awesome and ruthless, they were what you would expect from a clash of two beings of superhuman strength.
What I liked about it so much was that it wasn't just a movie about the exploits of the amazing Spiderman, but also the personal struggles of Peter Parker. Even the conflicts of MJ, Harry, Aunt May, and Doc Oc. It's a damn good movie, good enough to leave work and play hooky just to go see it.

broken heart... who cares?

What's so scary about falling for someone? Is it the sleepless nights, neglected meals, awkward moments? The moments when your eyes meet and you purposely flick your eyes in another direction, but with her still having your complete focus. Or if she or someone else will notice that you covertly took her picture. Or the smiles that you unsuccessfully try to hide.

It's the rejection of course, when she rejects and denies ever having you in her life. When you hold her hand and she breaks away. When you can't do anything but sit and watch and wonder if she will ever look at you again without a pinch of contempt in her lips. When all you can do is wait for the time when she is completely lost from your life.

My angel... the heartbreaker.

But my heart's been broken countless times before, and look I'm still here. Your smile still takes away all my weariness, and gives me strength to mend a heart you've crushed.

don't take my AK47 away

Four minutes.
I'm gonna have to run the rest of the way up to the clock. I'll just have to park, but here comes manong with his mirror-on-a-pole. I'm sure it'll just be a negligible delay.

Three minutes.
Oh yes manong, I keep a weapon cachet on the underside of my vehicle. That's a rocket propelled grenade jutting out where the muffler is supposed to be. What, my trunk? There's nothing there but a spare tire and a few dismembered body parts.

Two minutes.
Just let me in, if I were a terrorist and wanted to make headlines, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't bomb a parking area. No one will shed tears and boo the government for a dozen destroyed cars ans SUVs.

One minute.
Within the last stretch of my struggled race from bed to desk, not the traffic along morning EDSA but the unoptimized use of both elevators that proved the insurmountable challenge.

Zero.
As both elevators' doors open with a ding, a body-clock six stories above switches into red ink with a clack.

Aw hell, might as well go for that apple pie.

late night friday

We were laughing, having fun; dancing, jerking around,
You were conversing with your friends, oblivious to our racuous merriment.
Our attention to an antiquated accessory, a pair of large yellow-tone sunglasses.
We kept trying it on for amusement, looking ridiculous in turn.
Then you put them on.
And I couldn't find anything to laugh about.
For looking at me was an angel, of flowing midnight-dark hair and her accentuated eyes that beamed brighter than any star.
The fool instantly lost in her gaze.

My angel... the killjoy.

You took away my one reason to laugh, and you gave me all the reasons to smile.

that damn bus

While driving to work, I came across this bus that was entirely painted in a well-known pizza food chain theme. The memory of the encounter would've been completely lost and forgotten as the gargantuan traffic obstruction passed (with me casting a few curses up his direction), but illustrated on a rear window was a man with a celphone supposedly inside but desperately trying to see the number for the pizza delivery. I'm sure that made at least one driver smile that morning.

It can only be described as... silly. But quite an effective marketing technique. It was the only thing in my mind that morning. And I'm sure it'll pop up even after a few months later. While other brands try to outdo each other by making their commercials look "cool" (a beer brand and telco come to mind), its the silly ones that win with brand name recall. How can we ever forget commercials with lines such as "Kitang kita, mas malaki sa ***a", or the Nano-nano jingle?

We forgot all about the cool guys and girls and their "in" hairdos and wardrobe. We forgot all about your celebrity talk and your machismo walk. Because what we remember are the people that stayed with us, our small talks, our late night phone calls, our embarassing moments.

Those $&#@! buses... I'll break off their steering wheels and smack their wrists with it.

lather, rinse, repeat

How many mornings have we successfully woken up, eaten breakfast, brushed, showered, dressed-up, then went to work/school without even a single conscious thought?

routine.

I'm actually grateful for the thirty minutes that my mind won't have to process the repetitious rituals I've been doing for the past ten years or so. It's amazing when an hour has passed without our realizing it. There's nothing really enjoy or relish in brushing teeth. Or celebrate the wonders and intricacies of preparing corned beef.
But how much time each day are we really in this clockwork mindset? Officework, going to Church, even relationships we sometimes do out habit. Then everything we do everyday becomes ritual; routine. Everything becomes predictable, nothing's left to enjoy or examine.

tedious.

Live the moment. Find the magic in typing, debugging, eating lunch, or walking down to the terminal. There are the small details we never saw because we didn't even try to see. Find it in the akward grace in her step, or the smile at the corners of her mouth. It's not so amazing when ten years has passed without our realizing it.

first post! oh yeah, blog me baby

it's all about me! or whatever. not much to tell. if your reading this there's a good chance you already know what i'll be blogging about, either i already told you, or i'll be telling you anyway. i'm just a boy, blogging around. feel free to blog back.